Dysfunctional relationships

The course of our lives are governed through the choices we make. When a relationship erodes from our being we are confronted with some choices. We must choose to either attempt improving it or sever the ties.

This fundamental works in every relationship from one of conjugal love to friendship. What when one is dealing with dysfunctional blood relations. The choices are still the same, however tougher to implement.

We are often confronted with sour relations which we, nevertheless, want to keep because we feel mutual love still exists. I've often wondered about the love inherent in a blood relation. Most often what matters here is inevitably the relation itself and not the person involved and that is the root of the problem.

A mother, for instance, will love her daughter named Divya. What matters here is the daughter and not the person, Divya. The same holds true vice versa. Both the people are substitutable in this relationship.

It doesn't really matter WHO the daughter or mother is as long as the title of 'daughter' and 'mother' are held by two individuals.

One effective method, in my opinion, to mend a dysfunctional relationship is recognising the person behind the title. Thinking in terms of WHO is involved. This way, there is more mutual respect in the relationship. This is an essential prerequisite to a bond. I'm saying this assuming that both parties feel that the relationship is dysfunctional and want to improve it!

A haze

Shadows sweep across the floor
as eyes blaze past and mine dart to and fro.

Everything seems smooth to my trembling fingers
a craving for texture gnaws at my soul.

The thoughts are blurred like a pond
that ripples with the belligerence of that little leaf.

Slow down & feel the pulse of my aching body
that has been gyrating with the cadence of time.

Stop and feel the cool breeze
that caresses my back.

Alas!

The haze of moments that could have been mine to keep
will haunt me through my sleep.