Fortifying chaos

We often come across situations where our hard-earned peace must be defended from circumstances bursting with unpredictability and chaos. How often does one reach a point where unpredictability needs protection?

I’m standing face to face with the uncertainty of certainty. The oxymoron here is only perceived. If looked into, it reveals an intriguing rationale. My recent past is flushed with millions of moments… all a result of the spontaneity prevalent in my circumstances and my personality. I find this chaos comforting and have kept life moving at a fast pace, fast enough to keep me ebullient. My future seems menacing now… menacingly slow!

There was never a dearth of the doors of opportunity. I kept knocking and had the choice to turn away from them if I did not like what I found inside. I want it to be that way forever. Now that I think about this, it boils down to change. However, the change I speak of is not a change in circumstances but a change in the way I look at these circumstances. I thrive on change and would not ever want to live a life devoid of it. That is what worries me.

I relate this to the feeling that burst through my being atop the last cliff I scaled. It’s the feeling of looking at the edge without knowing the path to survival until I stepped off. The only truth is the distant world below streaked with traces of life and more cliffs in the horizon waiting to be conquered.